Let's try again?

It had been a while since the last time I wrote a piece here.

I am here again to write about how things I feel. And I feel like jumping off a building. I hate my life... I'm tired so tired of things that does not go your way. But hey maybe your thinking, " this guys has some issues and problems". Yes I think I do, and it really bugs me a lot. I want to scream so loud and express my anger... I am so fucked up ( sorry for the word ). But I feel so shitty. I want to feel pain, feel the pinch of pain on my skin rather than the stroke of punches to my heart and mind.
Am I not a person worth of anything. Don't I deserve happiness as well? I did almost everything why for them. Is my happiness a big thing that no one can give it to me, when will I find it. I thought I did seems like the issue is totally different from the idea I had once.